Who Needs Valentine's Day Anyway?

Are you tired of looking at all the Valentine's Day stuff at all the stores already?  How about having to hear about the sappy love stories coming out in theaters or invading your favorite channels?  Are you feed up with Valentine's Day?  Yeah, it all stinks.  Well, don't worry about it!

I've got the perfect list for you. Check out Best Anti-Love Songs For Valentine's Day!  That is bound to cheer you up.  For each love song, you can even watch the music video on YouTube.  Boo to Valentine's Day!  Yay to anti-love songs!

Voice Activated Televisions

Recently, I've been hearing a lot of talk about voice activated TVs.  Apparently a number of companies are trying to create this.  I don't know about you, but I want to voice my unhappiness about this right now.  I am not interested in a voice activated TV. 

All day long, I have to be polite the the people I work with, friendly with people I meet on the street, and when I make a call to any company's number I have to talk to an automated service.  I am tired of it!  Now, when I get home and I can finally get some peace and quiet, am I going to have to have a conversation with my television, too? NO!  I refuse! 

I love my TV.  It is the one thing that won't argue with me.  I can just use a remote control and it is awesome.  Why are companies trying to complicate something so easy and simple?  As an example, my bank recently changed their extremely easy phone system to a more complex, super annoying phone system that I have to talk to in order to just hear my account balance.  I used to punch in some numbers and I was done.  Now I have to talk to something that is not human and I have to speak clearly or it gets confused.  Back in the good old days, I could have a mouthful of food and still use the system.  I can no longer enjoy that simplicity.  I have to be polite to a machine.

I can't stand the thought that I may have that simple joy taken away from me and my TV viewing.  Perhaps some people that lose the remote all the time might like this, but not me.  Please please please... any executives from any companies that make televisions that read this (fat chance, I know), don't take away my one simple pleasure in life.  Please don't make us all have voice activated TVs.  I might actually just opt to read or something instead.

Buy Some Workout DVDs!

Maybe it is time to get off the couch.  OK, I said it.  Yes, it is the beginning of the New Year and perhaps it is time to get in shape.  If you've been sitting around on the couch too much watching TV, you might want to consider getting up and working out.

Now let's keep in mind, there is no reason why you should have to stop watching TV just to workout.  You should totally keep the TV and watch some DVDs instead.  If you are interested in learning more about some of the best workout DVDs and what you can expect from them, you can check out: The Best Workout DVDs

Not only can you use some awesome workout DVDs to lose weight, you can also watch fitness programs On Demand.  There is no reason to actually stray too far away from the couch to go to the gym.  After all, you are going to want to lay down on the couch if the workouts get a little too difficult.  So don't just sit there and get overweight.  You can watch TV and workout at the same time!

Dudes and Chick Flicks

I used to believe that because I did not like so-called "chick flicks" - tear jerkers, romance movies, and that type of thing - that was a major plus on my part with the guys.  I thought this put me a cut above the rest.  Many women force their guys to watch Sex and the City or something like that.  Not me!  I like slasher movies and comedies.

Recently, I learned I was terribly wrong with this assumption.  More men today are being taught to be sensitive.  There is nothing wrong with this, but for some reason, this also seems to mean men like "chick flicks" now. The funny thing is, guys think that is a major selling point for them.  So many men tell me, "Hey, I like the Notebook... I even cried."  Yeah, pal, you are a dime a dozen.  Every dude likes chick flicks now.

So, for the record, if you are a dude that loves chick flicks, you are not alone.  Trust me, you are really really not alone.  If you are a woman that thinks bragging about your dislike for chick flicks is going to get you anywhere, it just isn't.  This is the way the world works now.  So now, I've got to think of something else that will impress the dudes.  Bummer.

Jersey Shore - The Educational Aspects

Some people tend to think MTV's Jersey Shore has nothing useful to offer its viewers, but I beg to differ.  I have learned so many wonderful new facts from watching Jersey Shore.  I am ever so grateful Jersey Shore returned to MTV last Thursday.  I am sure there is much more to learn!

I now know the meaning of the terms GTL, grenades, gorilla juicehead, and smushing.  I also understand the importance of a good tan.  I realize it is better to be orange than pale.

Aside from those educational moments, I've also learned some new dance moves, such as the Jersey Turnpike and fist pumping.  I know how to have a great dance battle.  I also know how to dress (or not dress) when going to the clubs.

As if all of that was not enough, I've even learned some awesome fight moves.  I am ready to defend myself at a moment's notice now.

Thanks, Jersey Shore!  You've made my life better in so many ways! 

For even more life lessons from Jersey Shore, check out:

What I've Learned From Watching MTV's Jersey Shore

Horror Movie Lessons

Sometimes you have to learn things the hard way in life.  Other times, you can learn valuable life lessons just by watching horror movies.  You don't believe me?  Well, let me clue you in on some things you've probably already learned just by watching horror movies.

If an axe murderer is chasing you, don't you try to run out the door instead of running up the stairs?  Thanks, horror movies!  We now know that is the rule.

If you have to go into the woods, do you go alone or take a friend along?  Of course you take your friend with you!  You know if you split up the crazed killer will get you!

When you meet a new man with mommy issues, don't you think he might be a creep that tries to kill you in the shower?  Of course!  You can thank Alfred Hitchcock for that one.

Would you ever drop the knife or the gun just because you believe the killer is dead?  Never!  The killer never dies the first time around.  You must remain prepared.

All of this knowledge comes from watching horror movies.  Where would we be without them?  Probably dead in a ditch somewhere, that is where.  So before you insult horror movies, I suggest you take a second look at them and discover how useful they truly are. 

For more fun with educational moments in horror movies, you can check out:

Life Lessons Learned While Watching Horror Movies

Poor Parenting Techniques Seen in Horror Movies